‘Those people are brainwashed – that’s why they did what they did’ the friend I had been discussing terrorism with at the end of a late Saturday night assertively stated. His eyes were fixed on me, and the tone communicated an ‘I am informing, not discussing with you’ tone. My lines in the dialogue were short, and I was mostly a listener. If this were a tug of war – he would be tugging away giving himself rope burn without looking up at whether I was even holding onto the other end of the rope. I had let go, and decided I did not want to play the game any longer.
That opinion of his – that brainwashing is what drives terrorism left me pondering. I could not help sense a pang of irony in the statement, in that much of the past ten minutes had consisted of him speaking at me about ideas of his that already seemed certain. He did not much want to hear my questions, and instead answered questions he had presumably heard previously, but that were entirely different from the points I wished to raise. If we all enter such discussions seeking only to inform and convince, rather than to listen and understand, I fear we are part of the problem that our world is facing.
Another friend I spoke with last week let me know about some people she knew who suggested riding in Ubers was dangerous due to the possible Muslim backgrounds of the driver’s. I found it upsetting that people felt that way, but opinions like this are important to discuss and bring into the open to offer the possibility of re framing. If these ideas are only discussed with other people who agree with them, they will remain a truth to those people.
To quote my friend’s 12 year old ‘we must all come together as one’ in the face of terror. As cute and simplified as this is there is a truth in the innocent idea that we do all have common ground somewhere, and finding it would enhance feelings of compassion for one another. We are all a product of our environments and the more we all stick to only the same environments, the less we will understand about others. I was going to keep this blog free from such topics, but laying on my bed after a long Spanish sun in London day – it’s what my hopefully non-brainwashed brain has to offer. Personally, I am going to try to listen and understand other people more, no matter what their opinions. I won’t throw the rope down and say I wont play the tug of war, but perhaps I can suggest a gentler game to play out disagreements. Catch anyone?
Yesterday, my friend told me that she refreshed my blog several times in the past two weeks, only to find the same already read story at the top of the page. With no updates for over a fortnight, I had left my little readership without material. Further, I had not provided myself with the written outlet I was so enjoying. My blog fell silent and it appeared that I may have been about to say goodbye to it, as I have done with so many other hobbies. ‘I guess you need to have some new topics to post about?’ the same friend enquired. The truth is I have had plenty of topics to ramble about, and numerous daily trails off into deep thoughts which could have been mapped out upon these pages. The pause was a reflection of being busy – and therefore having plenty to blog about. The pause was also because I work on whims and excitement when I start something new. When the excitement fades, I can struggle to maintain that same energy and motivation.
Laila Bloggs 